12 Coolest Evil Lairs and Criminal Hideouts


Over the years, we’ve been treated to some brilliantly evil villains on screen. These shady adversaries all have their own signature evil lair as their headquarters when they aren’t busy plotting to take over, enslave or annihilate the world. So what makes a good lair?

In the best criminal hideouts we look for sheer scale and ambition, legions of henchmen who seem to volunteer for such skullduggery, armies of button-pushing assistants in white coats, internal monorail systems, next-generation weaponry, hoards of gadgets, the occasional rocket or glamorous vehicle and control rooms full of people giving orders though the compound’s own PA system – and all this has to be in an unknown location that is often so obvious that it eludes detection. A good lair is indicative of the criminal mind hiding there. Here are 12 of the best!

The White Witch of Narnia’s 

Snowy Lair of Jadis, NarniaThe White Witch of Narnia was the Queen of this fictitious kingdom in The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe. She put a curse on the kingdom that made it winter for eternity. Her elaborate castle was a sort of winter wonderland constructed of nothing but snow and ice, like one of those ice hotels on steroids. The White Witch was a 7ft tall, beautiful woman who had the power to wave her wand and magically turn someone into stone-cold statue. The White Witch displayed the petrified remains of her victims inside of her castle for all to see, which is just a little creepy.





 
Tortuga, Haiti



Throughout the 17th Century, the Island of Tortuga was a hotspot for pirates who would use the island as a hideout. By 1640 the pirates of Tortuga called themselves the Brethren of the Coast and had established the island as a place to stash their loot. The piracy problem got so bad on this small Caribbean island that the French governor imported 1,650 prostitutes to Tortuga in an effort to “regularise” these out-of-control pirates. The chaotic reign of the Brethren over Tortuga Island came to an end at the end of the 17th Century when treaties were signed with other nations to help prevent another “pirate infestation” like the one throughout the 1600’s.


3 Lex Luthor’s Many Hideouts



Lex Luthor: Superman’s number one nemesis has had a plethora of hideouts throughout the years. Here’s a list of Lex Luthor’s known lairs straight from the Superman Encyclopedia: “a complex of buildings held aloft by a giant dirigible high above the stratosphere, a glass-enclosed city of ancient, weird design, an abandoned factory, a gigantic man-made meteor floating in outer space, an abandoned barn, a secret underground lab, a giant spaceship, a secret mountaintop laboratory, an electronics firm, a hidden laboratory on the outskirts of Metropolis, a laboratory hideout that has been lined with lead to conceal it from Superman’s X-ray vision, a massive fortress-like citadel on a lonely mountaintop north of Metropolis, a lonely farmhouse in the mountains north of Metropolis, a secret lead-lined subterranean hideout built into the side of a grassy hill, and the elaborately equipped Luthor’s Lair, Luthor’s Lair II, and Luthor’s Lair No. 5.” Whew! Luthor’s most ambitious lair appeared in Superman Returns when he blasted a Kryptonian crystal encased in Kryptonite into the seabed off the eastern seaboard. The ensuing continent that would be created would destroy every other continent on earth killing billions of people in the process and making the planet inhabitable for Superman. Ingeniously crazed indeed.


Shipwreck Cove, Pirates of the Caribbean



Shipwreck Island, and more specifically Shipwreck Cove, were the meeting places of the Brethren Court (governing body of the pirates) in the Pirates of the Caribbean films. Shipwreck Cove is said to be an “impregnable fortress, well-supplied, and able to withstand nearly any siege.” It is said that this fictitious island’s land mass is composed entirely of shipwrecks. Shipwreck Cove was ruled by the Pirate King, leader of the Brethren Court, played by Keith Richards in Pirates of the Caribbean III.


Dracula’s Castle, Romania





This castle is officially known as Bran Castle, and it was once one of the residences of Prince Vlad Tepes, aka Vlad the Impaler. Vlad the Impaler is best known for his cruel and unusual punishment techniques, as well as for being the inspirational figure for the 1897 Bram Stoker novel, Dracula. Today, some people refer to Vlad the Impaler as Dracula. The Bran Castle still stands today, in Romania, and features a host of underground secret passages and rooms that may have been used by Dracula for any one of his “blood-sucking” rituals – you never know.


6 Dracula’s Castle, Romania





This castle is officially known as Bran Castle, and it was once one of the residences of Prince Vlad Tepes, aka Vlad the Impaler. Vlad the Impaler is best known for his cruel and unusual punishment techniques, as well as for being the inspirational figure for the 1897 Bram Stoker novel, Dracula. Today, some people refer to Vlad the Impaler as Dracula. The Bran Castle still stands today, in Romania, and features a host of underground secret passages and rooms that may have been used by Dracula for any one of his “blood-sucking” rituals – you never know.


 
Arkham Asylum, Gotham City 



Arkham Asylum: The Arkham Asylum has housed some of the worst criminals that have ever roamed Gotham City. A short list of the inmates include The Riddler, The Penguin, Mad Hatter, Two-Face, and maybe the most famous – the Joker. The Arkham Asylum is built on top of a large underground cavern; it’s a very dark and gloomy place to say the least. The fact that this place houses so many famous villains from the DC Comic world definitely makes it one of the worst evil-filled lairs on our list.


8 1428 Elm Street, A Nightmare on Elm Street 



1428 Elm Street: This house in a small suburban town in the state of Ohio was the home of the infamous Freddy Krueger. Freddy had secret rooms in the basement of this house where he stored all of his torture devices, newspaper clippings of his crimes, and of course his famous glove with razor-sharp blades attached to the fingers. The actual Freddy Krueger house went up for sale back in 2006 for approximately $1 million. I wouldn’t live in that house if you paid me to live there, but in a sub-prime world you’ve gotta do what you gotta do! 



 
Death Star, Star Wars 



The Death Star is the evil empire’s deadliest weapon in the series of Star Wars movies. Luke Skywalker was able to destroy the Death Star II, and Darth Vader, in Return of the Jedi by using the Force. The first Death Star was an immense planet-killing space station with an overall diameter estimated to be between 120 km and 160 km to accommodate a crew of 265,675. To protect the Death Star, it was equipped with 10,000 turbo-laser batteries, 2,600 ion canons, and over 700 tractor beam projectors. But those underpaid Empire engineers forgot about that pesky shaft to the core, maybe they outsourced some of the design?


 
Lord Voldemort’s Headquarters, Lucius Malfoy’s House 



Lord Voldemort is Harry Potter’s greatest nemesis, and he took over Lucius Malfoy’s house after he broke into Azkaban and released all of the inmates. He called this place his headquarters, and it’s where he and the other Death Eaters devised their evil plans. Malfoy Manor was a very elaborate home with many odd features. One of the weirdest aspects of this home was the white peacocks that were the resident pets of this evil lair, which was a strong contrast to the overall evil feeling of the house. Overall, this was a very creepy place, but for Lord Voldemort it was a nice “upgrade” for him, and it suited him perfectly. He spent many years living in the forests of Albania, and he finally called Lucius Malfoy’s house his own after the death of Dumbledore.


 Dr. Evil’s Secret Underground Lair, Las Vegas 



Dr. Evil has occupied many secret lairs during his career as an “evil doctor” who was always trying to take over the world. In Austin Powers International Man of Mystery, Dr. Evil occupies an underground lair near Las Vegas that was located in the Nevada desert. Here, Dr. Evil plans to “hijack some nuclear weapons and hold the world hostage”. His elaborate control center consisted of a gigantic nuclear warhead that was to be used to trigger massive volcanic eruptions around the world, part of a dastardly plan he called “Project Vulcan”. Dr. Evil’s populated his underground hideout with a choice selection of henchmen including his sidekick Number 2, Alotta Fagina, Frau Farbissina, Mustafa, and the eye-pleasing Fembots. Future Dr. Evil lairs included a hideout in the Seattle Space Needle, and a secret spot behind the famous Hollywood sign in Hollywood, California.


Scaramanga’s Secret Hideout, Koh Tapu





For those who don’t know who Scaramanga is, he’s one of James Bond’s most infamous adversaries from the 1974 movie Man with the Golden Gun. In this James Bond flick, he hid his gigantic, deadly laser weapon inside a small island, which is today called James Bond Island and is located in the Phang Nga Bay National Park in Thailand. The true name of this island is Koh Tapu, which means Nail Island, and it has become a major tourist destination for James Bond enthusiasts.

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