Ghostbusters Proton Pack - Ghostbusters
Dan Aykroyd first turns on his unlicensed particle accelerator in an elevator, which shakes with a subsonic rumble as the other Ghostbusters cower in the corner. Turns out special effects can deliver a rock-solid punch line.
Rail Gun - Eraser
A railgun is a form of gun that converts electrical energy (rather than the more conventional chemical energy from an explosive propellant) into projectile kinetic energy. It is not to be confused with a coilgun (Gauss gun). Rail guns use the magnetic pressure force to drive a projectile. Unlike gas pressure guns, rail guns are not limited by the speed of sound in a compressed gas, so they are capable of accelerating projectiles to extremely high speeds (many kilometers per second).
Freddy’s Glove - A Nightmare on Elm Street
‘One Two, Freddy’s Comin’ For You…Three Four, Better Lock The Door..’ We all know the rhyme, and for a few years, thanks to the industry inundating the screens with Freddy and his nightmares, we were all pretty well frightened, too. Freddy Krueger was a horribly disfigured and burnt walking cliche who also happened to own a killer metal glove featuring four fingers of razor sharp blades. He haunted the sleeping thoughts of the younger crowd ’surviving’ on Elm Street, and more often then not, disposed of them in any number of gory and vicious ways. But, most frequently, he employed the use of his ‘fist of fury’. Very sharp.
Portable Burst Missile Launcher - Spawn
The second most powerful weapon in the game, the Portable Burst Missile Launcher fires three missiles per cartridge. It causes tremendous damage, though it has a slow rate of fire and also slows Spawn’s movements while he wields it.
Phased-Plasma Rifle in the 40-Watt Range - The Terminator
Even though we don’t ever see this gun in action, the mere mention of it so blows the mind of Mr. Futterman the Gun Shop Owner that we just know we have to have one. And the fact that the Terminator walks out of the store with enough firepower to invade Cuba and still seems disappointed tells you all you need to know.
Noisy Cricket - Men in Black
What’s pocket-sized but still capable of destroying a city block?. It’s the MIB’s surprising li’l Cricket. This isn’t a gun to wave around when you want to scare someone, it’s one to whip out when you mean business. And think about it—it’s dainty, shiny, and fits easily into a handbag. It’s the perfect gift for the futuristic warrior woman in your life.
ZF-1 Assault Weapon - The Fifth Element
The Swiss Army Knife of assault rifles. The ZF has rockets, darts, tracer bullets, netting, a flame-thrower, freezing gas-anything and everything you need to destroy the universe. The only problem is, a crate of these bad boys will set you back four ancient, mystical stones each. We don’t care if you’re the Sultan of Dubai, that’s some serious scratch.
Glaive - Krull
A mystical weapon of unknown origin, the glaive might not be the most versatile weapon on the list—it is, essentially, an over-sized ninja throwing star—but it more than makes up for its shortcomings in style. Even if all you intend to do with it is chop blocks of cheese or scare your cat, you’ll look cool doing it. And it’ll end an “ultimate Frisbee” match in seconds.
Lightsabers - Star Wars
An elegant weapon, for a more civilized age.” Whether your particular brand comes in badass red, noble hero blue, or Samuel L. Jedi purple, the lightsaber is such an intimidator, it can even make a two-foot Muppet seem tough. You don’t even have to use it, just flick it on and its unmistakable hum clearly says: “Somebody’s walking out of here without a limb.”
Sick Stick - Minority Report
Cops in the future have come so far. No longer armed with lame wooden sticks that are only good for tapping on driver’s side windows, these new sticks make anyone you touch vomit instantly. Seriously—no tequila, no pictures of Britney Spears’ vagina, just a single touch! It’s fun, and it’ll also double as a convenient time-saver for your bulimic girlfriend.
Iron Giants - The Iron Giant
What could be better than a 50-foot robot armed with advanced alien weaponry? One that can also babysit the kids! One part nanny, one part War of the Worlds, the Iron Giant would be the ideal home defense choice for families. Kidnapping would practically be rendered nonexistent if we had these things to chaperone the kids at the park or take them to school.
The Death Star - Star Wars
Talk about home defense. The only thing more efficient than owning a weapon to protect your house is actually living inside the weapon. The Death Star can entertain a small country’s worth of houseguests, has plenty of parking space, a recycling plant on the premises, and enough firepower to destroy an entire planet. You might want to slap a screen door on some of those thermal exhaust ports, but otherwise you’re living in the lap of destructive luxury